Life definitely takes a different turn at this age. I should know because this is my life now.
I can’t say why but somehow the love and attention that accompanied me from birth right into my teens has seized all of a sudden. Before now, my parents worried sick if I hadn’t eaten lunch or dinner then they stopped caring and presently, they don’t even bother to ask why I decide to starve from 6 pm. My satisfaction was kind of a big deal but not anymore. Now, they just stored their food in the fridge and moved on with their lives.
Gone are the days when they bought me clothes. Those days when I didn’t have to worry if my clothes were wearing out or getting out of style because I was sure of some new ones during the holiday, then without prior notice, they stopped buying my clothes and they stopped asking.
I didn’t have to create my style. I just wore whatever I was given and I still looked good. Out of the blue, I’ve have been left to take care of myself. I now read books on grooming and how colours and patterns should be worn. I didn’t think I would ever be so perplexed over just covering my nakedness. But it’s happening!
I could go on and on about this sudden abandonment I feel and how the freedom I craved when I was 11 has become my reality and I am totally puzzled on how to go about it.
Don’t even get me started on friends. What friends to hang out with and what friends to discard. Formerly, it was all about who had the best toys and the biggest space to run around. Nobody cared who was a bad influence and who was of a good influence. Friendship was for fun and laughter. Those were the good old days before everything became so complicated.
On my twentieth birthday, I knew I was right to have mixed feelings.
I had arrived at the judges’ table where I will be placed in one of the three categories existing in the society.
I was either going to a promising youth with a bright future, who would graduate from college, get a good job and make everyone proud or I was an average youth who will struggle through life or I was going to be dependent on my family for the rest of my life.
Mind you, I was placed in any of the categories based on my last test results from school and that identity stuck, as long as it I didn’t change it by proving myself in some magically way. It stuck for life.
This is the confusion that hits you the moment you turn 20. Nobody escapes it.
It is the confusion of having to choose between too many options thrown to your face all at once. Your whole life becomes a giant box, full of options just waiting to be tossed and picked.
So when you pick, bear in mind that this is your life and you have every right to pick what makes you the happiest.
This age comes with the confusions of identity. This is the time when you choose if you want to stand out or become lost in the crowd. Remember that whatever decision you take should be based on what you have been able to learn about yourself and not what others told you about you.
The years ahead are the years of unquantifiable fun and adventures so whatever you do and wherever you go, do not lose out of any experience.
Get neck deep into the confusion, make your own mistakes and learn from them. Be stubborn, be real, and be brave.
These years are meant for you and you will never come across years as exciting and as confusing as your twenties again.
Live the hell out of them!