When You Are Wary of Falling In Love

Don’t get me wrong, being single and alone is not always your best option. As humans, we are social animals. And of course, we would want to be in relationships that would make us happier and stronger.

It is tough to be alone. And companionship doesn’t seem to be a bad idea. It actually strengthens and validates us most times. But what if we’ve been stabbed and broken by those we trusted?

Most people enter relationships with a lot of caution. There is always that fear and reluctance even when who we are with brings a lot of colors in our lives.

You really won’t find love when you are afraid to love. You have to be willing to share your vulnerabilities and flaws to appreciate someone else you are in a relationship with. Don’t fear, however as you grow older you always become a better lover and partner.


You suddenly understand that everything is fickle

There is not so much we can hold on to. Enjoy the moment. Even when you have been heartbroken, know you would find love again. There is a lifetime to be happy. And such is not meant for only a few moments.


You can love yourself

Perhaps you never loved yourself enough. You were so consumed with the other person’s expectations, desires and standards that you forgot what you really deserved anyways.


Some soul searching becomes essential at this point

Sure, you would need to ask yourself the right questions. What now matters to you? What did you really want in the first place. And whether you attained it or not, how do you learn from your past actions.


Some mistakes can hurt for a lifetime

Yes they do. So, to getting back on track, you may really need to change your attitude or perspective about life. You really need to laugh at your own self. Who says we can’t make a mistake here or there. But never let a mistake determine your growth as a person.


You would find new goals

Whether in your relationship or personal life, you will certainly need to embrace new goals. Perhaps you have become smarter and know what you should be expending your energy on.


You can take a moment

And perhaps that is what we all need, to pause and know what is meant to come next. It may be a desperate or vulnerable time for you, but you can heal and be strong enough for what will come after. It is about what you seek.


You can define how it will all play out

You are in charge after a couple of failures or mistakes anyway. So moving forward is not what you get emotional about. Of course, you shouldn’t be blindsided when you want to take the next step with your relationship goals. This is why you are in charge and can define how it will play out when you can take a break for some sou-searching.


You will find what you seek

It is either what you find comes to you or you learn to love yourself. Yes falling in love is essential but sometimes patience is required. Jumping and throwing oneself in may not be the best option most times. Perhaps some adventure will do. Playing a bit will do. Getting serious about your life goals or finding strength in friendly relationships could help so. The most times steering clear from committing could make you independent, free, strong and attractive. You will be prepared to deal with what comes when it comes. And even if it doesn’t work, you have failed before, you have learned how to love yourself and deal with the pain.