In Adam Grant’s book Option B, resilience is built when you can identify your strengths and turn towards it regardless of failure. We are all living an option B anyway. So no need to get stuck. We are always scared of the right person walking away. We are always scared of losing that job. We are always scared of losing that business or that loved one. Because we start wondering what happens next. How do we live without them or without it?
But people in our lives are not always a constant. Those who we truly love or who love us could walk away. The job or opportunities we thought we had could fizzle out. There really is no certainty. But dealing with such departure is what makes us happier and more formidable. Knowing and being aware that good things could come to an end makes us prepared for the worst or the inevitable. It could make us realize that the best person or thing to watch our backs is only inside us.
What if they walked away?
Search for some peace
Peace with yourself. Peace with them. Peace with what has happened. Perhaps what you would be holding on to are pleasant memories. Yes there were great times. There were times that made its mark. Having such profound thoughts could help us find peace with the situation.
We would survive
One of man’s greatest qualities or strength is adapting. Man would adapt or survive. That is why we are here, to beat the odds and win. So yes it is in us to keep on going, to show resilience and to keep on thriving. We don’t need to focus on the past, we can look ahead at the future. Because eventually we would survive.
They were never meant to stay
Some things are not meant to last. A lot of things may not last forever. But we can build on what was. Disappointments could present us with its own blessings. Paths could change but the goals remains the same – finding peace and happiness in queer world. So you really have not lost direction, you simply have to find a new path. Because they were never meant to stay.
Who knows what next
One beauty of being humans is that we rarely know what happens next. If we did perhaps we would have dealt with outcomes differently. Knowing tomorrow can really put off the excitement in dealing with it anyways. It seems so easier to take each step that we have, dealing with the present and the moment helps us find a basis to meet tomorrow.
There will be others
There will be others, trust me. The old always gives birth to the new. The world is filled with so many opportunities, tasks and people. There is no greatness in getting stuck. There will be new encounters and new opportunities to find what you seek or to gain what has been lost.
Let it go
Letting go doesn’t make you weak, it makes you sustained. Yes it can be dark to do so. But you will be fine. You will deal with the hurt and perhaps your mistakes. There are some things you cannot really fix anyways. But you can find new dimensions, new explanations, new definitions and yes, hope. And through all these you can rise and gain the power you need to deal with what comes after. Letting go would help you heal and what is not given could be taken after all.
Believe in yourself
We really don’t believe in our abilities enough. Yes it may mean you learn new skills, it may mean you travel to a new city. It may mean you find a new passion. But you will do just fine if you start trusting in what you can do for you when they walked away.